AUTHOR: Babygirl lizlee@star.net

PAIRING: John/D´Argo

RATING: PG-13 Suggested m/m relationship

SUMMARY: The final chapter in the "Internal Affairs" series.

NOTES: This is a sequel to my story "Emptiness Lost" and the "Blood Brothers" series by Aiobheann.

DISCLAIMER: These characters belong to Henson and the SciFi Channel, and no copyright infringement is intended by my use of them. The characters may not belong to me, but the story and my original characters do. Copyright 1999, Babygirl.

The song "In Your Eyes" the extended version was written by Peter Gabriel and is the property of Geffen Records.

FEEDBACK: I would love some.

ARCHIVE: Aiobheann's Farscape Slash, Smutscape, LALEA

Aeryn hesitated; it took a fraction a second for her to decide between the small Sumtaar fleet and Crichton.

She slammed her hand down on the button.

Suddenly, command was filled with an ear piercing shrill.

The Vith turned and stared at Aeryn in shock and alarm. In its over confidence it never expected to hear the siren of the Peacekeeper Padack beacon. It had never taken into account that the device was still on board and that Aeryn remembered how it had made Crichton twitch the first time it had gone off. It never occurred to the Vith that Pilot and his DRD's had been spending the last two days wiring the beacon's siren into the audio systems on Moya and increasing it's power. It never thought for one microt that the crew of Moya had been communicating with each other through the DRD's, carefully plotting this attack.

The Vith knew now that it had made a grievous error.

It could feel the vibrations of the siren pulsing through Crichton's body. It could feel its energy matrix being disrupted as well as its control over its host.

Frantically it turned and looked at the view screen in time to see the last of the Sumtaar ships pass safely through the wormhole. Turning back to Aeryn it lunged at her, trying to push her aside and detonate the Farscape module. Aeryn grabbed the Vith by the shoulders and pushed back with all her strength.

"Pilot!" she yelled. "Increase the volume!"

The Vith stumbled back on wobbly legs, teetering from side to side as the siren grew louder. Aeryn held her breath, hoping that the ear splitting siren would be enough to force the Vith out of Crichton. It was a long shot; all they knew was the subtle way Crichton had reacted to the Padack beacon, blinking and curling his face. D'Argo, Zhaan and Aeryn had agreed to take the chance that it would be the right frequency to get a Vith out of a human. They knew that if they did nothing, Crichton would surely die.

A small access panel in the corner opened and a DRD zipped out. It was tethered to Aeryn's pulse rifle which dragged along behind it. Stopping at her feet she quickly untied the cord and lifted her weapon up to point at the Vith.

The creature still jerked about violently, dropping to its knees. From the main hall, D'Argo approached carrying his Qualta rifle with Zhaan right behind him.

The creature howled as Crichton's eyes and mouth filled with a sparking light. Aeryn ordered Pilot to increase the volume some more. Instantly Crichton arched back with hands that curled and twisted in agony. His head was thrown back and there was a bright glow. D'Argo, Aeryn and Zhaan watched as the Vith exploded out of Crichton in a bright cascade of swirling colors until it hovered like a ball of energy in the air. The moment the last bits of the Vith were out, Crichton's body slumped heavily to the floor.

Aeryn took a step forward and stared at the Vith in its true form. It glowed bright and swirled with a dazzling array of colors. For all of its savageness and cruelty, the Vith was actually a beautiful being.

Slowly it floated forward towards her, its sparkling matrix shimmering in a hypnotic display of lights and patterns. Aeryn found she could not pull her gaze away from its brilliance that held her as it she was in a trance. Her body relaxed and she lowered the rifle in her arms.

"Aeryn! Shoot it!" Zhaan yelled.

Aeryn blinked at the sound of Zhaan's voice but found she could not pull her gaze away from the ball of light that floated towards her.

Zhaan put her hand on D'Argo's shoulder. "It's got her hypnotized! You have to shoot it now, before it takes over her body!"

D'Argo raised his Qualta rifle and fired.

The moment the weapon's discharge reached the Vith there was blinding flash of light and a shock wave that threw everyone off their feet. D'Argo looked up at the Vith and watched as the glowing ball of energy snapped and sparked. As it's matrix destabilized bits of energy shot out in all directions. D'Argo raised his arm to his face to block a small bolt of loose energy flying at him. He hissed as he felt a thin stabbing pain in his arm. Lowering his arm he looked at it and saw a small smoldering hole in his sleeve.

Suddenly command was filled with hot, flying bits of energy that rained out in all directions. Without a thought D'Argo crawled over and covered Crichton's limp body with his own, doing his best to protect his defenseless Sword Brother from this burning storm. Soon his back was stinging from several hot pinpoints, but he remained still.

D'Argo was unsure how long he lay there over Crichton until he felt a hand on his shoulder. Looking up into Zhaan's face he realized that the room had returned to its dim lighting and the siren had been shut off.

"It's over," Zhaan smiled. "The Vith is dead."

D'Argo sat up pulling Crichton with him and cradling the human in his arms as Zhaan and Aeryn kneeled down next to him.

"John," Zhaan whispered as she stoked his forehead. "John, wake up, you´re safe now. The Vith is gone."

The three watched as Crichton slowly opened his eyes and looked at them with a gaze that seemed unfocused. Turning his head towards D'Argo he let it rest in the crook of the Luxan's arm and stared at his Sword Brother. D'Argo's hearts rejoiced as he gazed into Crichton's eyes he knew that there was no more trace of the Vith.

Then Crichton's eyes closed again and his body sunk heavily into D'Argo's arms.

D'Argo pulled Crichton close and held him tight.

* * * * *

Eilynn's recovery was complicated by the fact that the Viths careful attention to the disposal of her drug case had left her in the throes of painful withdrawals. D'Argo held her tight as she shook and cried in pain. He had been with her for several aarns now, watching over her as she struggled against the chemistry in her body.

"Please, D'Argo, please make the pain stop!" she begged.

D'Argo grabbed a small vial from a nearby table. It was the herb mixture Zhaan had made up to ease Eilynn's withdrawals. Popping the lid off he held it up to her lips but she slapped it out of his hand.

"Get that frelling stuff away from me!" she hollered. "It doesn't work, I need my drugs!"

D'Argo didn't speak he knew that nothing he could say would make things better so he just held her.

"Why won't you help me," she whimpered. "I thought you loved me!"

D'Argo still said nothing; for the last aarn she had gone from pleading to screaming to crying and back to pleading. It was hard, he hated to see her in such pain and some of the things she said to him had a stinging edge, but he knew this was the only way. Even if he wanted to give her her drugs back he couldn't; besides, he knew that kicking her addiction wouldn't be any easier later on so she might as well get it over with now.

It was a logical thought that wasn't very comforting.

Eilynn settled back into his arms and was quiet. D'Argo stroked her forehead, which was cold and soaked with sweat. He was thankful that she had quieted down but knew it would not last for long. Her bouts seemed to come in waves, soon she would be shaking and yelling again but for now she could rest.

Lowering her back down on the table he pulled a blanket over her and sat down in a nearby chair to rest. Eilynn had been kept in the maintenance bay, close to the scanning equipment and Zhaan's medicines should her injuries deteriorate. Shortly after the Vith was killed, Crichton was brought back to his quarters rather than the maintenance bay. His injuries were not as severe as Eilynn's and it was agreed by everyone that until she knew the truth, Eilynn probably would've wanted to wake up next to her rapist.

Slumping back in the chair, D'Argo rubbed his face and sighed heavily. He was worried about Crichton and wondered how he was doing. John had felt so light in his arms when D'Argo carried him to his quarters. He only had cuts and scrapes but D'Argo knew that the Vith had taken a terrible toll on John's body. He wanted to be by Crichton's side, but for now, Eilynn needed him more and so he remained in the maintenance bay.

* * * * *

"D'Argo?"

D'Argo looked at the hand on his shoulder and then at Aeryn. He was just laying Eilynn back down after another bout of shrieking, pain and insults.

"How is she?" Aeryn asked.

D'Argo wiped her forehead with a towel and pulled the blanket over her again. "She's resting, for now."

Aeryn gave his shoulder a slight squeeze. "I'll stay here and keep an eye on her, you should go see Crichton."

D'Argo looked at her and saw how tired she looked. It had been a full day now since the Vith was destroyed and he knew she had spent most of that time watching over John. She looked about as tired as he felt.

"How is he doing?" D'Argo asked.

Aeryn lowered her eyes as if she suddenly couldn't look at him. "You should go see him."

Aeryn's response filled D'Argo with dread, without another word he hurried out of the room.

* * * * *

Approaching Crichton's quarters D'Argo caught the foul scent of sickness that hung heavy in the air. He suddenly feared what he would find in the room and stopped at the door to look in. What he saw nearly made his hearts stop. Crichton was lying in his bed with his head turned slightly towards the door. His face was pale to the point of almost looking gray, there were deep circles under his eyes and his cheeks were sunken and hollow. There was no color in his lips, which were usually a soft pink, and his skin had a pasty look to it.

The worst part was he was so still, D'Argo's first thought when he saw John was that he was dead.

Swallowing hard he stepped the rest of the way into the room. At that same moment, Crichton dragged in a shuddering breath and moved his head slightly. D'Argo let out a breath that he didn't realize he had been holding. John was still alive!

"How is he?" D'Argo asked Zhaan who was sitting on the edge of the bed. She had pulled the covers back and was changing the dressings on Crichton's chest. The claw marks Eilynn had inflicted looked painfully swollen. D'Argo was saddened at how much they distorted John's beautiful chest.

"His wounds are infected," Zhaan said softly. She had a small jar of clear pasty ointment and was smearing it along Crichton's swollen lacerations. "He has a fever that has been getting slowly but steadily worse."

D'Argo sat down on the edge of the bed on the opposite side from Zhaan and took John's hand in his. With the other hand he reached over and stroked the side of his face. John's skin was slick with perspiration and unusually hot. At the feel of D'Argo's hand Crichton made another gasping inhale and muttered something incoherent. All the while his eyes remained closed.

"Has he been awake at all?" D'Argo's voice was just above a whisper.

Zhaan finished with the clean dressings and pulled the blanket up over John's chest. "No, he mutters from time to time but doesn't make much sense." She reached over and put her hand on D'Argo's arm. "The only clear thing he's said is your name."

D'Argo pulled Crichton's hand up close to his chest and sighed deeply. "Is there anything we can do?"

Zhaan squeezed D'Argo's arm. "We're doing all we can, the rest is up to John."

"That thing," D'Argo spoke struggling to hold back a sob. "It took so much from him, his body is so worn out."

Zhaan removed her hand from D'Argo's arm and stroked Crichton's cheek with her finger. "He is strong." She then stood up. "I will go see how Eilynn is doing."

D'Argo watched her as she left the room and then looked back down at John. "I love you," he whispered.

* * * * *

D'Argo was only able to stay with John for about an aarn when Zhaan called him on his comm. badge and told him that Eilynn was awake again and asking for him. D'Argo leaned forward and kissed John lightly on the forehead before leaving.

He hated to do it, he wanted to stay there with Crichton and watch over him. His fever hadn't gone down at all and D'Argo feared the worst. He hated being pulled back and forth like this but he had no choice. Eilynn needed him just as much as John did and although he loved them both he knew he could never give himself equally to them. His love for one would always be stronger than his love for the other. For the first time he finally realized where his hearts belonged.

* * * * *

D'Argo stayed with Eilynn for several more aarns. Time and Zhaan's herbs had eased her withdrawals and allowed her body the chance to finally be cleansed of the drug. As always D'Argo held her as she cried but this time it was from shame. She apologized for all the things she'd said and for all the grief she had caused him. D'Argo pulled her close and reassured her that he knew it was the drugs and her own pain that was talking.

As her strength returned and her wounds began to heal, the subject of what had happened finally was addressed.

"Why did he do it?" she asked softly. "Why did Crichton hurt me like this?"

D'Argo stroked her cheek with his thumb and sighed with relief, for now he could clear his Sword Brother's name. "It wasn't Crichton, it was an energy being called a Vith. It was an assassin sent by your people that possessed his body."

"My people," she said with disdain. "I'm ashamed to call them my people." She nuzzled closer to his chest. "I had wondered what Crichton meant when he told me he was sent by my people. He said they had a message for me, that, as a female I should know my place…and then he raped me."

"Zhaan said that it is easy for a Vith to control the body it's in," D'Argo said. "I know that if he could've, Crichton would've done all he could to stop it."

"I know," she whispered. "When I was being attacked, for a brief moment I think the Vith had lost it's hold because Crichton looked at me as if he was ashamed of what he was doing. I guess Crichton is the one who has been raped worst of all."

"Yes," D'Argo tried to hide the choking sob in his voice.

"I can tell you love him very much. More than anything else, it seems."

"He is the other half of my soul. I didn't know how empty my hearts were until they were filled with my love of him."

Eilynn turned her head away from him. "I guess I can't compete with that."

He pulled his arms tighter around her. "I'm sorry, I do care for you so much but…"

"But you are decent enough to be honest with me." She reached up and ran her fingers down the side of his face. "Most creatures spend their entire lives searching for a love like you share with him, the love I can see in your eyes. I will rejoice knowing you have found that love."

D'Argo leaned down and kissed her gently on the forehead.

"D'Argo!"

D'Argo turned to see Aeryn standing in the doorway with a frantic look on her face. "Come quickly, Zhaan needs our help."

"What's wrong?" D'Argo noticed that Aeryn was holding four empty buckets in her arms.

"We need to get ice," she said. "Crichton's fever has gotten worse and Zhaan says if we don't bring his body temperature down he will cook in his own skin."

D'Argo looked back at Eilynn with frenzied eyes.

"GO!" she said, pulling out of his embrace.

D'Argo flashed her a thankful look before turning and running out of the maintenance bay with Aeryn.

* * * * *

Aeryn and D'Argo came into Crichton's quarters, lugging a bucket of ice in each hand.

"Into the tub," Zhaan ordered.

Running into the bathroom the two dumped the ice into the washing tub that was already filled with cold water. D'Argo then came back into the room and looked worriedly at Crichton. John lay in sheets that were soaked with the sweat that was streaming off his body. He was dressed only in his boxer shorts that were drenched in sweat and clinging to his skin. He was shivering violently and tossing his body back and forth. Zhaan was doing her best to hold him still but he pushed at her relentlessly with his hands. All the while his eyes remained closed as if tossing from a horrible nightmare.

"No! Get away from me!" he yelled as he tried to sit up.

Zhaan grabbed him by the shoulders and forced him back down. Pressed against the pillow, Crichton arched his back and cried out incoherent words as he kicked out weakly with his legs.

"Is the tub full?" Zhaan gasped as she struggled to hold John down.

"Yes," D'Argo said moving over and slipping his arms under Crichton's and around his chest. John's skin was burning hot to the touch.

Aeryn grabbed hold of his legs and the two lifted him up and carried him into the bathroom.

"Lower him into the water slowly," Zhaan instructed as she followed behind them. "And be prepared, he will probably put up a fight."

D'Argo could feel the muscles in John's body tense as he was lowered into the icy bath. Zhaan sat down on the edge of the tub ready to act if John should start to rebel. Once he was settled into the water D'Argo and Aeryn held him there, both soaked to their sleeves in the icy water, their arms already starting to become numb. D'Argo watched as John breathed in short shallow gasps and feared that the cold water would be too much of a strain on his already weakened body. He had heard of this type of drastic healing technique for fevers, a dangerously cold shock to a body that would most certainly die from the fever if not treated. He had heard of it simply referred to as "cure him or kill him." He knew that John only had a fifty percent chance of surviving.

The room was oddly quiet as they all watched and waited.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Crichton screamed and lashed out. His flailing arms and kicking legs sent great splashes of icy cold water on the three.

D'Argo wrapped his arm around John's chest while he gripped one of John's wrists. Zhaan grabbed onto his other wrist while Aeryn struggled to hold his legs down.

"AAAAAAAAAGH! NO! NO! GET AWAY FROM ME!" John hollered and fought with strength fueled by his delirium.

Through all his kicking and screaming D'Argo, Aeryn and Zhaan held him tight and kept him in the cold water. The struggle lasted for a long time until the three were all soaked through from the splashing.

Then as quickly as it had started John stopped his struggling and slumped down weakly in the tub. Cradling his head in his arm, D'Argo reached out to pluck a piece of ice from the water to place on John's forehead. To his surprise he could find none, Crichton's fevered body had managed to melt all of the ice.

Zhaan leaned forward and placed her hand on John's forehead. "His fever has gone down," she sighed. "But it still hasn't broken. We need to get more ice."

"You two go get it," D'Argo said to Zhaan and Aeryn. "I'll make sure he stays in the tub."

"He could start to struggle again," said Aeryn. "Are you sure you can handle it?"

"I will keep him in this tub if I have to climb in and lay on top of him."

Zhaan smiled sympathetically at him, then the two women got up and left the room.

D'Argo shifted Crichton's body so that his head was cradled in the crook of the Luxan's powerful arm. "Hold on, John," he whispered as he stroked his cheek.

Crichton's body tensed and pushed against the sides of the tub. "Oh God, no!" he moaned softly. "Please stop…please stop hurting him."

D'Argo leaned his head down close to Crichton's "It's okay, John," he whispered wondering if John could hear him. "You're safe now."

John pressed his head into the crook of D'Argo's arm and reached up blindly with one hand. D'Argo caught John's hand in his and squeezed it tight.

"Oh please stop hurting him," John continued to groan. "Please, please…I love him."

D'Argo kissed John's hand and prayed silently to his gods that Crichton would not remember what the Vith had done.

* * * * *

Crichton had nearly melted the second batch of ice before his fever finally broke. He was lifted out of the tub, dried off and tucked in under several blankets. His frail body now shivered from being cold instead of from the fever.

D'Argo sat down on the edge of the bed and softly stroked John's hair. "Will he live?" he asked, turning to Zhaan.

Zhaan shook her head sadly. "I don´t know, sweet D'Argo. It's up to him now."

"D'Argo?"

D'Argo turned suddenly to the sound of his name whispered faintly and saw Crichton looking at him. John had opened his eyes many times during his fever but they had swum around in his head as if unable to focus. Now, however, John was looking at him with sharp, clear eyes.

"D'Argo?" he whispered again.

D'Argo felt his hearts leap with joy and he smiled wider than he ever thought possible.

"Yes, John," he said as he continued to stroke his hair.

"D'Argo, I…I love you."

D'Argo's hearts froze and his body went numb as he saw the look in John's eyes. He knew that look, it was the same look Lo'laan had in her eyes moments before she died.

"No, JOHN!" he shouted as he held Crichton's head in his hands. "Don't you do this! Don't you say good-bye to me!"

"I'm sorry," John's whisper was barely audible.

John was giving up.

D'Argo's mind raced frantically, he needed to do something to get John to keep fighting.

"Are you just going to let the Vith win?" he spoke furiously, "After all it did to you, you're going to give up now?"

John closed his eyes and D'Argo could hear his breathing become shallow.

"Do you remember what the Vith said to me?" D'Argo continued desperately. "About how you really feel about me? Am I supposed to believe that? Am I supposed to accept what it said because you won´t tell me otherwise?"

D'Argo breathed hard in choking sobs. "If you die now then I have no choice but to believe the Vith. If you die now I will always think that you were sickened by our relationship, that you think of me as an animal that has taken away you manhood."

He leaned down and pressed his face next to Crichton's. "If you leave me then I will live the rest of my life believing what the Vith said."

D'Argo was silent, listening to John's shallow breaths, counting down until there would be no more. He could not stop the flow of tears that streamed down his face and dripped onto John's cheek.

Crichton's breaths remained shallow and weak, one after another.

Then there was a breath that was a little stronger.

D'Argo held his own breath as he listened. He had expected Crichton's breathing to slow but instead they became more rhythmic. The next few breaths were stronger as were the few that came after that. Slowly, steadily, one after another John's breathing increased.

"Yes, that's it, John!" D'Argo whispered through his tears. He took Crichton's hand in his own and gave it a squeeze. "You hold onto me, you hold on to my voice! I'm here, I won´t leave you."

John's breaths were still shallow but they were much stronger and growing stronger still. D'Argo sniffed loudly and kissed John tenderly on the cheek, "You keep fighting, I'll be here when you wake up."

Then D'Argo felt Crichton's hand in his, ever so slightly. He felt a squeeze.

* * * * *

D'Argo wasn't sure how long he remained where he was, leaning over John with his cheek pressed against his. Time had seemed to drift into an unreadable nothing. D'Argo wondered why he was suddenly so aware of his surroundings when he heard something in his ear. Something that filled his hearts with joy.

It was John's breathing. Deep, solid and peaceful. He'd heard it before, on many occasions. Sometimes he would lay awake at night, after they had made love, and listen the to the strong rhythm of John's breaths. They were like a peaceful lullaby.

Now that strong rhythm was back, John was finally sleeping peacefully.

D'Argo raised himself up and smiled at the sight of John's face. His skin had its pink hue and his lips once again had a soft rosy tint. His features were once more soft and serene.

Standing up slowly D'Argo realized how tired and achy his own body was. He looked over and saw Zhaan and Aeryn asleep in their chairs. He woke them both and told them that Crichton was sleeping on his own.

The two women stood, stretched and surprisingly the three hugged each other, smiling and laughing.

"You need to get some sleep," Zhaan said squeezing D'Argo's shoulder.

"You two go on," he said. "I made John a promise."

The two women nodded and left the room as D'Argo settled down in one of the chairs for some much needed sleep.

* * * * *

"Oooooooooh, man!"

D'Argo awoke to the groaning voice and looked over to see Crichton moving his head. He quickly stood up and sat down on the edge of the bed.

He put his hand on Crichton's shoulder and gave it a slight shake. "John, wake up."

John opened his eyes half way and turned his head to face his Sword Brother.

"Hey, big guy," he groaned.

D'Argo's hearts nearly leaped out of his chest at hearing that familiar term of endearment. "How do you feel?"

"Ooooh, like I've been run over by a truck," John coughed weakly. "Can I have some water?"

D'Argo filled a cup from a pitcher on the nightstand. He then slipped his hand under John's head and lifted it up to the cup that was pressed to his lips. John took several long swallows until the cup was drained. D'Argo then eased his head back down onto the pillow.

"Jeez, D'Argo," John moaned. "What the hell happened to me?"

D'Argo took Crichton's hand in his and held it close to his chest. "You had a fever, John. We almost lost you." D'Argo couldn't hide the slight choke in his voice.

"Well I'm here now, big guy." John smiled softly and squeezed D'Argo's hand.

Shifting slightly, Crichton groaned again. "Oh, I had this horrible dream. I dreamed that this thing took over my body and made me do all this terrible stuff to you guys and…"

John stopped as his eyes focused clearly on D'Argo and he saw the faded cuts and bruises that littered his face and chest.

"Oh Jesus, D'Argo!" he choked. "Oh Jesus, no!"

"It's okay now, John," D'Argo gave his hand a squeeze. "The Vith is dead."

"Where's Eilynn?" John's forehead was twisted with dread.

"She's in the maintenance bay, recovering."

"Breg and Meyla?"

D'Argo only shook his head.

John pulled his hand out of D'Argo's and turned away from him on his side. He curled his body up, covered his face with his hands and started to sob. "Oh God, no!"

D'Argo put his hand on John's shoulder but the human shrank from his touch.

"John, it wasn't your fault."

"You don't understand, D'Argo, I remember everything," he sobbed. "I remember it as if I was doing it myself!"

D'Argo leaned close to John in an effort to comfort him.

"Oh God, D'Argo! I can't even look at you!"

D'Argo grabbed John by the shoulders and lifted him into a sitting position. He was surprised at how frail John felt in his hands.

"I couldn't stop it," John's eyes were filled with a profound sadness as tears streamed down his face. "I tried so hard to fight it but I couldn't stop it."

D'Argo pulled John close and held him tight. "I know, John. I know."

John sunk into D'Argo's embrace and tucked his head into the Luxan's neck. As he felt the warmth of his lover's body and the assurance of his comforting words he couldn't help hearing his song in his head.

"Excepting all I've done and said.

I want to stand and stare again.

Till there's nothing left out.

Oh, it remains there in your eyes…

…Whatever comes and goes."

THE END